Another Cut on my Wrist, Another Name on my List
by YeroismyHero
Summary: angsty rated for suicide
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Wicked is not mine, sadly. Though i did get to meet the touring cast!

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><p>Elphaba and Fiyero were fighting, again. Elphaba thought he was cheating, with a good reason; he was distant and barely involved in their relationship and she noticed that he wouldn't look her in the eye when they made love. She voiced her worry and now they were fighting about it for the millionth time. This fight was getting more violent than others have. Elphie sent a vase hurdling at Fiyero and missed his head by about an inch.<p>

"I know your cheating, Fiyero! Who's your whore?" the verdant woman seethed at her partner

"How many times have I told you I'm not cheating!" he shouted back tossing a chair to the floor

"You haven't so much as kissed me in a week, Fiyero. Just say it, you're bored with me or am I not good enough? Not good enough for you because I'm green?" she hissed across the room

"Glinda was good enough…" he scoffed under his breath

"What?"

"You heard me! Glinda was better than you were, better than you are"

"You and ….and Glinda?" she stuttered; heartbroken. Fiyero smirked he knew he had gotten to her. She was crushed inside, she thought to the night they ran away together from the Wizard's throne room he promised her that he had never laid with Glinda because he was thinking of Elphaba and just couldn't. She then thought of the first time her told her he loved her, then the first time they made love. She wouldn't let him see her cry she ran upstairs to their bedroom and slammed the door making the frame of their house shake. She went to her jewellery box which was mostly empty except for the pink flower clip Glinda (Galinda then) had given her; she took the thing and hurled it at a wall. She pushed on the false bottom of the thing and took out a tattered sheet of paper and a small razor blade.

She pushed the sleeve back on her left arm revealing scars and scabs, old and new, that were a bloody-rose color despite her odd skin. She lifted the razor to her emerald arm, dragging it across the smooth skin slicing its path. She stopped to let the tears spill burning her face leaving trails across her skin like a shooting star across the sky. She cut her arm again, and a third time before she dropped the blade and picked up the paper. Her list. Her list of all the people that ever made her cut, there was her father listed and Nessa, several children from grade school, and even Glinda, she reached for a quill and dipped it in the blood that glided down her arm she wrote his name in hate, and fear, and anger.

_Fiyero Tigelaar_, She wrote; the blood flicking messily about the page, _the one who I gave everything for and would again. Glinda deserves you, I never did. You deserve each other. I hope you're happy._

She picked up the blade again and slit her wrist. The last thing she saw was the blood gushing down her arm, staining the floor, before her eyes were blinded by tears and her face was burnt to the 3rd degree and her whole body was numb. In her last heartbeat she did not regret what she did she only hoped she would cause Fiyero as much pain as he had to her. She had no regrets at all, or maybe that was the loss of blood but to her this didn't matter. Her life didn't matter. 'Just another cut on my wrist' she thought bitterly. And then she was gone.

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><p>If enough people want me to i will make this a two-shot i want at least 5 reveiws. please? if yo give reviews you save elphie!<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

So i wasn't originally going to make a second chapter but i woke up this morning and the ideas started coming to mind so i wrote it down :P hahah i hope you guys liked this chapter as much as you did the first one...BTW i don't think i mentioned the Fiyero isn't a scarecrow in this but it's post-musical.

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><p>Fiyero felt awful the second those words left his lips, he chased after her up the stairs but the door was shut in his face, and he was locked out. He leaned against the door; he could hear her sobs from the other side. He slid his back down the door until he was sitting with his knees to his chest, he rested his head on the doorframe, and it killed him inside listening to her cry like that, because of him. He would have given anything to be able to go into that room and hold her, tell his emerald wife that everything would be alright. And then the crying stopped, the entire house was silent as the world around him stood still; holding its breath.<p>

He got up and tried the door again, getting worried and telling himself that she had fallen asleep. The handle would not give in so he threw his entire weight against the door it gave way with a loud crack. He stumbled into the room.

"Elphaba…" he gasped upon seeing her in a crumpled heap on the floor, he ran to her side. And then he saw her list, he knew what it was and his heart fell when he saw his name written in blood. Her blood.

Fiyero held her hands in his and tried to feel for a pulse, but found none.

"Fae, no" he pleaded desperately but was granted no response. He pulled her body into his lap and sat there with her, he wasn't sure how long; days, weeks, months even just sitting there stroking her raven hair staring blankly into the distance. When the flies came he swatted them off, when the hunger pains got worse he ignored them. How long had he been sitting there? A year, maybe. Finally the need for food became too severe, he held the lifeless body of his wife against him, holding her tighter; embracing the icy grip of death, revelling in the fact that he would at least be able to spend eternity holding Elphaba in his arms; he kissed the top off her head, and closed his eyes.

"You didn't deserve me" he decided quietly, "You deserved so much better"

And then the world went blank.


End file.
